How Do You Rebuild Yourself After a Breakup?

Breakups are pathetic, especially if it was a bad one.  It’s a difficult phase, even if you’re breaking up with an extremely toxic person.  Like many people, you might be wondering how you can rebuild yourself after a breakup.  It is important to note that it takes time to feel free from your ex’s influence or clutches.

After breaking up with a partner, a woman signed herself up for piano lessons.  The goal was to master the keys, keep herself distracted from stalking her ex on social media, and give her a new subject to talk about with her girlfriends as opposed to discussing her failed relationship.

Based on this experience channeling your energy and free time to something creative like learning an instrument, language, skill, and more can ease the pain post-breakup.  There are a lot more things that you can engage in to feel like your older self again.

The following 5 tips can help ease the disappointment and rebuild yourself after a breakup.

Engage in a Constructive Conversation When Talking About Your Breakup

Talking about your breakup is therapeutic.  This is especially so when sharing with people who had a similar experience before.  However, it shouldn’t be the only topic for weeks afterward because it will hinder your recovery process.

Lamenting about it over and over keeps you in victim mode, and you will have a hard time moving on.  The best way is to tell the story once and then seek guidance from your peers.  In fact, you will benefit more when you ask your friends who experienced a breakup before how they rebuilt themselves.  Then take advantage of their experience to rebuild yourself after a breakup or make your post-breakup life easier.

Hang out with a Supportive Group

At first, facing a large group of friends or family members might be too daunting.  However, you can do it by starting with the ones you feel more comfortable around.

A change of scenery, even when you don’t feel like doing it, will help you meet new friends.  It’s also a perfect opportunity to comb your hair, put on your favorite pants, and put on a smile.  People often dread going out after undergoing a breakup because it reminds them of the good time they had with their ex.

The brain pulls you down because it craves those feel-good chemicals you got when you spent time with your ex.  However, you need to get out and relax with your buddies and spend time with people in your life who makes you laugh or happy.  These are people who probably didn’t have a chance to hang out with you during your relationship.

Limit Your Presence on Social Media

Some ex turns to social media to share their whereabouts.  Being active on social media exposes you to this information which can leave you feeling confused.  In fact, your presence on social media should depend on how things ended with your partner and the kind of network you two share.

You should ask yourself whether it bothers you when your ex knows what you’re up to and whether you’re strong enough not to cyberstalk your ex if you remain connected socially.  If not, you should end your relationship with your ex online If you find it hard to keep your eyes away from their profile.

However, if you find it hard to unfriend them because you want to put your best selves forward, it’s wise to hide their updates.  Such actions can help you get over it more quickly.

List Down Important Lessons You Learned from the Relationship

Writing down the lessons learned will help you see what kind of partner you’re more compatible with and why your ex was not a good fit.  Spending a reasonable amount of time in self-reflection helps you find what you didn’t like about your ex, whether they made you feel like someone you’re not, and the compromises you made and resent.

You should also focus on the good part of your relationship, such as the qualities you like about them.  Lastly, you should consider what you’re looking for in the future. Evaluating both the positive and negative side of your relationship is one of the steps to rebuild yourself after a breakup.

Practice Gratitude

Happiness is a choice, and you can choose to be happy even after a breakup.  Some people experience a hard time when they break up with their partner.  In fact, some are forced to go back to their parents’ homes after the loss of the relationship.

However, you will feel happy when you look for something positive.  Your mood and overall outlook will definitely change when you spend a better part of your day thinking about positive things about life instead of mourning the loss of your relationship.


So then, you can rebuild yourself after a breakup when you apply the 5 tips.  Many people who managed to get over a breakup didn’t spend much time alone or blame themselves.  Instead, they spent time with their friends and taking care of themselves.  Today, the majority are now in thriving relationships despite their initial setbacks.


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